a friend lost

a friend lost

I’ve debated back and forth with myself for 4 days now about whether or not to post this. It’s not that it didn’t happen or I didn’t care, it’s just hard. I know I’m not the most popular blog on the face of the planet but I don’t want to be one of those “emo” blogs where I mope and cry all day. But I pretty much at this point have said just forget it, it hurts, I need to talk about it and if people don’t want to read it, they can skip it.

My friend, Katarina, committed suicide on Thursday night. She overdosed on morphine-based painkillers.

I really don’t care to discuss why as that only points fingers.

She was such a wonderful friend. We were like long lost twins separated at birth, lol. She was from Denmark and was one of many siblings. She was investigating the church, moved to Utah to be with her then-boyfriend, and found me and asked if we could chit chat occasionally as she knew no one here. Much like me. She also had a small daughter, Celeste, who is now a year old – right under my two. Beyond our significant others’ families, we really didn’t know anyone around our ages here. We were sort of each other’s strength, adjusting to the move and change.

I miss her terribly. I’m just trying to move on knowing that she would want me to. That she’s in a better place than the hard times she had been going through on earth.

I guess this is feeling like an announcement. But, maybe this is what I need to do. Just announce my feelings on it, send it out there, and just know that it’s okay and that we can all move past it.

She was my best friend, I love her and miss her so much.

I’ll never forget you Kat.
R.I.P. Katarina
December 3rd, 1985-January 17, 2008

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